What do they mean, “I interview well”?

I’ve now had 2 different hiring managers, in the MIDDLE of my interview with them, compliment me that “I interview/am doing well.”

To me this has got to be one of the worst things to hear during the interview.  In both instances, I was aware that I was starting to trail off at the end of my answers and it would be at this exact moment that they gave me the compliment.  Did the hiring managers sense my nervousness and simply offer these comforting words to calm me down?  A technique they pull out from their bag of tricks to motivate the candidate to do better?

If there’s one thing the whole interview, and subsequent rejection, process has taught me is that nothing is ever what it seems.  Broken promises, insincerity, false appearances, the whole gamut.

So this is what a quarter-life crisis feels like

Are you able to tell that you’re having a quarter-life crisis when you’re smack dab in the middle of one?  I guess it’s comparable to someone having a heart attack, but not even be aware of it.  You suspect you are, but aren’t sure.  Then the symptoms start being more pronounced and obvious, and you can’t deny it.

Symptoms: depression, anxiety, fear, feeling like you’re lost, uneasiness and uncertainty about the future.  Feeling like I’m not where I’m supposed to be, that I’m supposed to be further along in my life.  Instead, I’m still stuck at the starting line.

It’s the uncertainty that gets to me.  When will I find a job?  What job will it be?  What’s going to happen?  I should be excited at not knowing; who likes a movie when you already know what’s going to happen right?  Just sit back and enjoy the ride.  Easier said than done.

Ask yourself: if you could go to any point of your life in the future, where would you go? I would fast-forward to the day I die, and I bet many others would too.  Yea you die, but at least you know!  I want to know when, how, why, who I saved by blocking that bullet, what disaster I prevented by pushing that button etc.  I need a Death Note, except call it a Life Note.  Let me write in how my life will turn out.  Boring I know I know, I’m the model accountant stereotype.

I have a friend who graduated almost 6 months ago, and at this point in time still hasn’t found a job.  If he suffers from the same QLC, then he’s hiding it well.  On the scale between optimist and pessimist, I’m most certainly closer to the pessimist side.  It’s not like I was born like that, but it developed slowly over time.  Little disappointments throughout my life left their mark, and being a pessimist was my way of dealing with them.

I’m not under any financial strain and my mother actually told me that she can lend me money to spend, god bless her heart.  Nevertheless I’m keeping my spending at a bare minimum.  However I’ve read recently that in hard times, it’s the little luxury purchases that keep your spirits up.  I see the logic.  Let’s see now…buy Dark Knight DVD in December.

Dim Future

Everyday during the past few weeks I’ve been obsessively checking out the Career forum at Red Flag Deals.  There’s a CA accounting firm thread there you see, as has been the ritual every year at this time.  It’s been my main source of information during this recruitment season, and, quite honestly, pivotal in helping me stay sane.

Originally intended by the OP to be for people who have received interviews from the Big 4 + Grant Thornton to talk, has instead been mainly to let people know when they’ve been REJECTED for interviews.  Every few days somebody would post when interviews were handed out for each school, and if you weren’t one of those who got one then you would know.  Immensely helpful since it keeps you from sitting by the phone everyday just waiting, wondering, daydreaming.  Not to mention reading about others complaining about not getting an interview reminds me that I’m not the only one.

Rumours abound as to why people didn’t get hired though.  E&Y having a 3.8 GPA cutoff seems to me the most outrageous and most likely false.  If I wanted to I could’ve started a rumour too.  Hmm lets see here…PwC would throw away all applications that used the letter “E” in the first sentence.

For someone in my position (rejected by Big 4), Krupo says to find another accounting job in the meantime or keep applying to other small-midsize firms.  I’m currently doing both, keeping my eye out for jobs as well as mass-mailing CA Training offices.  Am I too late?  What about the other 90% of grads out there in the same position as me, having a similar (or better) résumé?  There’s probably 1000+ qualified accounting grads out there, with only so many positions.

Big 4 Rejections

Can’t say I’m surprised. I’ve always have a major inferiority complex. Deloitte, KPMG, Ernst & Young, PricewaterhouseCoopers…never were in the cards for me. But damn, not even an interview? Let the inner reflection begin.

Probably a billion things wrong: grades not high enough, not enough experience, not enough volunteer/extracurricular activities, crappy cover letter, pissed people off at the information sessions, guy shortlisting my application hates my name.  Jeez…just like analyzing a break up, just a bunch of “what if’s” and going around in circles.

I know all the reasons against working at a Big 4: huge workload, repetitive tasks, overhyped by recruiters. Repeating them in my head makes me feel better. Yea you ivory tower disgraces, I don’t want in your club. Secretly I do, but hell if I let you know that. Just try giving me an offer, I’d rip it up so fast……wait I’m kidding, are you going to give me an offer?

So what now? Find a position at a midsize firm, if that. Not the end of the world, but not exactly the top of MT. Everest either.